wash your hair
While I explore the maze that represented by my external hard disk to find some photos for this post, I smile thinking about the different reactions that such a article will generate on the different people that populate the Middle Kingdom.
I bet the white devils perpetually pissed off, the ones that always claim “if the government doesn’t change its politics we will all die because of the pollution” and “Chinese only like to spit and burp on the street,” will appreciate this post.
The guys that study Chinese since they were born, quote Confucius every time they can, read Mao Zedong’s books in Chinese and, when they see you on the street, explain to you:
“See, you never stop to learn Mandarin. For instance, I only know seven thousands five hundred characters, I should study more…”
will shake their heads, unsure whether to pity me or feel offended, and then think:
“This Furio is very easy to surprise, he probably landed to China last week. See dear Furio, China has many thousands of year of culture, you must understand it before to judge.”
And maybe they are right…
The majority of Chinese people will… deny. Or politely let me notice that I only know how to criticize their country.
However this article is not meant to be taken SO seriously, hence…
You know you are in China when:
1) You are on your way to the supermarket when you get splashed by a girl who is washing her hair on the sidewalk.
2) While you are walking on the downtown you see lots of kids peeing on the street encouraged by their proud moms.
3) The nurses enjoy their cigarette break to cut the nails of their feet in front of the main entrance of the hospital.
4) To dry a three kilos fish close to your underwear is synonymous of prosperity.
5) You go to the hospital and your privacy is threatened by thirty two other people that check your tests with the doctor and comment every blood value with a resounding “Ohhhhhh“.
6) You try to take a pic of a passerby but he anticipates you and takes a photo of you with his one thousand euro Canon D40 before you have the time to shot…
7) Go out on pajamas is for you a great satisfaction.
8 ) Youngsters (and less youngster) support the umbrella for their wives who are afraid to get tanned and look like peasants…
9) You can easily recharge your electrical scooter in front of Walmart and then explore the town trying to kill some pedestrian that is unable to hear your silent motorbike.
10) Sleep during your work time is one of your favorite hobbies.
p.s. I already told you how much I love the street pajamas street fashion?
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About Furio Fu
Number 5 drives me insane! Why is it that everyone else’s business in China is simply ‘free entertainment’.
Loved the pajamas one…. I’ve still not quite worked up the courage to try it myself, I think I’ve gotten as far as wearing my house slippers out…. which is a big mistake let me tell you, especially when you realize you’ve trodden in spit and are now about to bring it back indoors.
I’d like to add one to the list ‘You know you’re in China when… seeing a group of Chinese standing around watching two dogs having sex doesn’t seem unusual, and you also stop to observe and comment to the dog owner on what a fine specimen of an animal he has.’
Hey Sam,
thank you for the contribution to the topic eheh
About pajamas and fashion in general, (especially) in Beijing I noticed a funny stuff: I will see a lot of couples where the girl dresses kind of elegant while her boyfriend is out in shorts and flip flop. Weird!
Also, I think that lack of privacy in hospitals (number 5) and people staring and commenting about dogs having sex on the street are related. IMO we don’t do that because we feel weird invading someone else “space”, even if it’s a dog.
However, maybe because they are too many and just cannot afford it, this respect for territory and privacy is not present in other countries as India or China
Ya, I agree, that’s the conclusion I came to also, the size of the population governs the way the culture has developed and there really isn’t much space for privacy…
I think the dogs are OK with it though, they never seem to bothered in my opinion, although I’m no expert in canine body language.
You’ve also put me onto perhaps a winning female attraction technique: ‘shorts and flip flops’. I’m gonna give it a go… you never know…
Yes, dogs seem ok with that hah
Let me know if the “shorts and flip flops” works ; )